The only thing real non-monogamy should always be is consensual and ethical for many events included.
Talking from individual experience, I’m able to point out a couple of ill-advised situationships with dudes whom stated their girlfriends had been “cool with it” (SPOILER ALERT: these were maybe not). They made excuses due to their shitty behavior by telling me personally there was clearly “no way that is wrong to accomplish poly, my emotions to be overlooked had been the fault of “culture,” and I also had been just way too much a normie to “get it.” Unfortuitously, the usage gaslighting and basic dishonesty violate both the “ethical” and “consensual” an element of the entire “ethical and consensual non-monogamy” thing. It really is about inviting individuals into the life, staying away from them up and tossing them down.
Never assume exacltly what the partner desires or does not want.
Among the core the different parts of consensual non-monogamy is chatting candidly and seriously about everything вЂ” face to handle, not in furious email messages. Be truthful regarding the very own boundaries, but never ever assume anybody is cool or otherwise not cool with one thing simply because you will be.